Missinq Him.

iRealized how much i miss him today. he hit me up. at first i thouqht oh qod wah did i do wronq now. but then . . . idk . i did nothinq wronq. he just wanted to tLk. and tht feLt so qood. cause were friends. but we havent tLkd in a whiLe.... tLkinq to him feLt qood. feLt Like oLd times when he used to hit me up every niqht. & wed jus tlk about nothinq. & even thouqh we were tlkin about absolutely nothinq- it felt magical. it feLT right. imiss him so much. we qave eachother so many chances, so many times to qet it riqht, yet we faiLed everytime. everytime we watched "Us" falL apartt. "Us" became " him " & "i" . then we became "Us" aqain. & this repeated too many times to even count. we qot to the point we realized it wasnt workinq. For the Lonqest time i thouqht it was my fauLt. iWasnt pretty enouqh, or sexy enouqh, or smart enouqh, or funny enouqh. it hurt. but then i realized it wasnt tht at alL. it just wasnt workinq.& maybe one day we couLd try aqain. but for now this is whats best. because i couldnt take it anymore. because he couldnt take it anymore. because breakinq up & makeinq up, fiqhtin & yelLinq, back & forth every day. it became too much to handLe. too much to take.so we qave up. or did we really? idk. Maybe Fate wilL brinq us back toqether. Maybe we`lL jus be friends . who knows. alL i know is. iM Missinq him. & iKnow hes missinq me.

&- as Nelitza says - " if its meant to be , itlL be " So Lets just hope for the best .

Shes [ ^^ ]mad CooL btw- qo staLk herr [:

D O N T Lie to me

So i need to vent . TOO many lies beinq toLd. Needa qet this shit off my chest. so here qoes .

- Dont constantLy telL me you love me , then telL her the same thinq . its SOOO unnecessary .

- Dont Give up on me, you know i deserve more than that.

- Dont qet my hopes up, then let me down .

- Dont telL me youre my best friend, then abandon me every couple months.

- Dont call yaseLf my bestfriend. then constantLy telL me im fat. or uqly. or constantLy remind me of my fLaws. fkn bitch. look in the mirror.

- Dont calL me a whore then go out and fuck every nikka on ya block .

- Dont calL me uqLy. im not the prettiest qrL in the worLd but im probabLy a hundred times prettier than yu bitch. qo eat a cheeseburger. qain a pound or two. yu look hunqry ! >:O

- Dont make promises you know you cant keep .

Lonq story Short - DONT LiE TO ME.

Waitinq in the Rain .

There was this LittLe qirL. She spent her Life waitinq in the rain for this qhuy . She sat in the rain cryinq & cryinq her heart out. With each second that passed , the raindrops felL harder & harder. And with each raindrop that fell , came a teardrop aLonq with it. As oLd memories came rushing back into her mind. The past unbearable , the future feared, & the present too painfuL to speak of. Then came in the storm , liqhtninq, thunder the whole shabanq . And then she sees his face. But hes not really there, its solely a figment of her imagination & she knows this yet something inside her reaches out for him . She pokes out her hand, & looks into his eyes. Tears still rolling down her precious cheeks. The Look in his eyes brings the tears down even faster. She keeps her hand reaching for his for days, weeks, months. The storms qettin` worse. Tears still flowinq. Hes stilL riqht there. But then something happens. Time is passing and she notices a change in him . Hes fading . Hes not the person she thouqht she knew. Hes a familiar facee, but not a comforting one. A stranger at heartt , fading slowly. Little by littLe , til she can barely see him . All the while, her hand is qrowin weaker & weaker. Her eyes - exhausted. Shes become angry & bitter. And with anqer , her tears come to an end. Shes done cryinq, Now she just yells & yells & yells . Not even words , jus noise & pain flowin out of her. But she receives no response. The liqhtininq & thunder come to a hault. All thts left is rain . She finally puts her hand down , & with everythinq in her she yells " I cant wait anymore . . . i cant love you anymore . . . goodbyee " She just couldnt wait any lonqer. As she turns toward the stairs she notices the rain start to stop. She steps up the stairs & says " i Loved you " . The rain slowinq with each breath & each step. She reaches the door, steps inside , turns and whispers " i really really loved you " , & as she closes the door, the rain stops.